Life is strange when the past and future are lands rarely tip-toed in anymore and the present passes so quietly. Sometimes I miss the chaos of other places and lives, sometimes not.
Watching and reading the local and national news updates can wear the mind down quickly. Sometimes I aggressively shut the screen of my laptop or gently (but irritably) close out my phone screen and toss it out of arm’s reach while letting out a frustrated “Ugggggg.” The world – scratch that – people can be so awful and right now it is hard to see much else. I’m forever joking “Oh sure, now that I am focused on getting my life and shit together the world wants to fucking fall apart.” Feels true most days. Sometimes I comically wonder why I bothered to dry out and beat down some of these other demons when the country is heading into such dark times. This person doesn’t even feel like me at times, but she looks and sounds like improvement. She’s healthier. She pays her bills on time and almost never wakes up with regret. She makes a mean banana bread.
Of course the viewing material has not cleaned up much. Just a river of R-rated and worse smut. Even some of the music videos I adore betray the good woman act and hint at a person more into sex, blood, drugs and rock n’ roll. Guess even after we clean up some of us freaks still need our freaky escapes.
Maybe one day the escape won’t have to be so… imaginary.
There are days when it truly does feel as if everything is going wrong. World wide pandemics and environmental crisis. What feels like the country currently ripping itself apart in what I can only desperately hope is the demolition stage before a glorious rebuild. The president is a fucking monster and does what a fucking monster will do if you put it in charge. The most maddening thing was it was a racist piece of shit before the last election and so many voted for it anyway. I guess we all have rights, including the right to vote the car off the road and toward a mother-fucking cliff. The creep is supposedly ill tonight and it is hard for me to drum up much empathy for creatures not capable of feeling it themselves.
Funny, I’m not prone to disliking all monsters and have worn the badge proudly myself a time or two. However I know that there are some places you should keep free of them and the office of the president of the united states is one of those places. Somebody with half a brain in their skull, half a heart in their chest cavity and a touch more morals than I possess should probably hold down that position. Not THAT thing.
Sigh. Moving on.
The fires all up and down the west coast, especially in this state, have been making the national news again for another uncomfortably long length of time. Here things remain calm but I’ve been following the local and statewide fire updates more intensely than the most avid sports-ball fan. Not for entertainment of course, but because there is now a wildfire “season” each year and it is fucking bananas.
Staying indoors a lot to avoid smoke. Some days it clears up for a bit and we get to let the breeze into the home. Other days we seal the house up and stare out the window into something that sometimes reminds me a little of Stephen King’s The Mist. The sun is still pink at times. The first of this month’s two full moons was pumpkin orange. It’s a bit of a trippy reality.
As for the more positive?
Started a goofy old book about ghosts. Not sure it it is good enough to share the title just yet, but found out that there was a film adaption and a remake of that film in the 80’s so will probably watch those after I finish it. Have a few other books I should dust off and get to as well.
My kids are awesome. It really needs no paragraph, just that.
I’m getting mildly excited about Halloween. Okay, perhaps more than mildly. It’s hard to say what will change in October though. More dark clothing, spooky witch vibes and regular horror movies? Hell, I was already doing that most days. ;-P I do need to bust out the old decorations and get to it though. It is still the best month even if it does not feel very autumn-like yet.
Its-its ice cream bars are still amazing, even after all of these years.
It’s also miniature candy bar season.
Life is not perfect, but it is still living. Tomorrow could literally bring anything. Seems like a good place to end this rambling. Sweet & Wicked Dreams to whatever poor souls have dedicated themselves to reading this ridiculous blog. I’ll try to spice it up in the future. 😉